Have you ever been so frustrated with something, someone or someone(s) that you just wanted to SCREAM? Maybe I should re-phrase that: when was the last time you were so frustrated with something, someone or someone(s) that you just wanted to SCREAM? We’ve all been there and in this imperfect world we live in, it can happen more often than not. Many times our circumstances surpass what we formally recognized as our ‘limits.’
So what do you do? Getting angry doesn’t seem to help much and may even make things worse. Responding to a situation without resolve is a waste of time, otherwise you are destined to relive the frustration again…and sometimes over and over.
I try to ask my employees, friends, family (whoever is concerned) to not just bring me their complaints or problems, unless they can do so followed with a potential solution or remedy. Sometimes a person tries to engage as many people as they can find to ‘share’ their emotions and see everything from their perspective ASAP! Frank Costanza (from the Seinfeld TV show) said he was told to listen to some self-help audio cassettes in which the author said to simply say “Serenity Now” and the problems would gently melt away. Of course, if you know Frank Costanza, he knows nothing about subtlety or doing anything in a controlled fashion, so he would scream “SERENITY NOW!” in the heat of his angst.
Ironically, this isn’t always that crazy of an idea. Sometimes our bodies get all jacked up with these negative thoughts and feelings that in turn physically affect us. The body’s natural response is actually the old ‘fight or flight’ situation. We need to discharge these electronic receptors. This is why it’s good to go to a gym and work out, or play a heated game of racquetball or scream into a pillow. It’s why that iconic scene in the movie Network, where everyone threw open their window and screamed “I’m mad as hell and I’m not gonna take it anymore!” became a fad and gave rise to the primal-scream movement. It’s slightly ironic that the first step to serenity is the polar opposite of serenity. But when we keep those negative emotions bottled up and don’t deal with them, we become like a walking timebomb and some seemingly insignificant circumstance will trigger us.
Let’s be honest, in even a simple mundane day, they are plenty of things that send us to the edge. Everyone has opinions and we don’t all share the same perspectives, but that doesn’t mean we can’t co-exist without hating each other and losing respect. “Agree to disagree” seems trite sometimes, but the concept is right: Recognize we are all different and it is ok to be that way. There’s no need to become stuffed with the rage of indifferences or unique thoughts or ideas. Have something planned that can be your discharge on a regular basis; release those negative impulses and adopt a new perspective on different perspectives.