Paranoid much?
It may be a better instinct than you may think!
So there I was sitting on my new Honda Shadow 1100–so happy to own my first motorcycle! There’s nothing like riding the streets with the wind blowing in your hair and the sun in your face. Now, the reality is: I had angry bees fly in my mouth, tire scraps fly up and hit my leg going 65 MPH, and people almost run me off the road daily…Oh, and I haven’t had hair in years. The good thing was, my prayer life improved dramatically! Be assured: for all the “good” that comes with motorcycle ownership, there is equal and opposite…well, maybe more than equal…negative aspects. A perfect setting for the phrase; “Hope for the best, expect the worst”.
A few days after my first motorcycle purchase, I was in the office of my boss, a fellow biker, discussing the joys of motorcycle ownership, when he gave me the best advice I have ever received regarding driving a motorcycle.
“Just expect that everyone is out to get you!”
He didn’t mean it from the perspective of victimhood. He meant that trying to second guess any other driver on the road would lead to assumptions that could get me killed. From that day forward, if there was even a chance that someone couldn’t see me – I assumed they didn’t. If a driver was in another lane, I expected them to cut me off. More times than not, these ‘unlikely’ assumptions were correct, but I was ready for their crazy driving habits–because I was expecting it.
Another interesting thing I learned I was doing wrong was picking which side of the lane I would drive in. You don’t want to drive in the middle, because all that dark stuff is oil and debris – and you want to avoid that. But I figured I would get in the lane farthermost from the driver next to me and give them ‘room.’ Well, actually, my boss told me to drive instead in the side closest to the vehicle next to me. If drivers see you on the other side, they might think ‘oh good, I have space to pull in front of that tiny motorcycle and just force it to use its brakes.” Yikes!
It occurs to me that we can apply these guidelines to our lives as well. Anticipate challenges. If you live your life with the mindset that you will most assuredly come under attack at some point, then you’ll be amply prepared when it happens. We like to think we’re going to be okay if we do what’s right and take the high ground. Actually, this kind of makes us a target, because there are a lot of people, businesses, situations, who do not follow the same path you’ve chosen. They glide through their days feeding on the ideas of others. They do their best to discredit you. Sure this sucks, but if you know it’s possible and even likely, then you can be prepared for it. And as difficult as it may be, always stay true to your values and ethics. Our natural inclination is to fight back…yell…punch…go to social media and flame them! But…take a breath, count to 10 (I need a longer count–more like a day) and respond with as calmly as you possibly can.
Also, don’t shy away from threats. Instead, make yourself known…or seen. Be a force to be reckoned with, and meet your adversaries on the field with sword in hand and ready to battle! (I don’t mean to really get a sword….or any other implement…but you get the picture…) Your impulse to retreat to a quiet corner of safety is precious and sweet, but this is a dog-eat-dog world. All you end up doing is making yourself an easy target and prone to being abused. If you give an inch – they will always take more. So put your foot down and make a stand. You’re here to be involved and participate in the game of success!
I saw a scene from the popular “Walking Dead” TV series where the rough and tough Sheriff was talking to someone who had wronged him, but hadn’t responded in the way the bad guy expected. Then the sheriff made his position clear. He quietly said, “Don’t mistake my silence for weakness…”
You don’t always need to yell and scream or make a scene to get your point across or make yourself known. Focus on your purpose and goal and stand tall as you are engaged. But stay true to yourself and your position.
Actor Tom Selleck once shared, “I try very hard to conduct myself in an ethical way, because that’s important to my stability now. We’re a culture that’s so centered on the individual,” Selleck complains. “The culture says that basically nothing is more important than the way you feel. We’re living in an age that celebrates unchecked impulses.”
“A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps. Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time.” Proverbs 16:9